Super Bowl ratings tanked this Sunday as all 40 million Canadians boycotted the show in favour of watching Grey Cup reruns. “I’ve got the 1989 Grey Cup on a VHS tape somewhere I think,” said Bobby ...

Area man Garth Eby, 39, has just begun a yearlong project to dissemble every stitch of furniture in his house and replace all the screws with Robertsons. “I’m starting with the kitchen cabinets, ...

Even the Canadian satire industry has not escaped Trump’s trade war, with an expected 25% tariff to be slapped on all exports of sarcasm and mockery. “We don’t need Canada’s jokes. We have our own ...

Mennonites across Manitoba are excited about the new law firm Friesen Froese Harder that just opened up this week on Henderson Highway. “It was minus 35 on the day of our grand opening,” said Friesen.

With the trade war heating up things are getting testy, even at the rink. Last month a player was suspended for calling another player a Mennonite and now defenceman Brian Wiebe of Leamington has been ...

A totally normal carton of eggs sold for a record $80 million plus buyer’s premium in a Sotheby’s auction this week, smashing the previous record of $4.50. “I’ve never seen anything like it,” said ...

Henderson resident Dave Buhler, 51, has resolved to dedicate the year 2025 to Bible memorization. “If I really put my mind to it, I think I can have ‘Jesus wept’ down pat by next Christmas,” said ...

In response to Trump’s tariff threat, the Canadian government has appointed Corny Martens to clean up the huge mound of knackzoat leftover on the Gruenfeld ball diamonds last summer. “It’s been there ...

Darren Klippenstein, janitor at Fifth Mennonite Church in Grunthal, rushed to the scene this evening after he heard the Women’s Quilting Club had spent all evening “spilling the tea.” “We didn’t make ...

Area woman Diane Klippenstein has a longstanding tradition of writing “please delete if not allowed” before every single social media post. “Whether I’m selling my canned beets or inquiring what time ...

Devout Mennonite and local tulip farmer Aldert Alderliesten decided he would commemorate 500 years of Anabaptism by setting the Guinness World Record for most successive baptisms. “The previous record ...

Area man Abe Friesen is under the impression that the specific type of Mennonites that he is familiar with, those who speak Low German, wear suspenders, forbid dancing and drinking, and complain about ...